Fahr Farms Inc.

Assalamu'alaikum....

First of all.... just wanna say... forget about what I wrote previously. LoL. I was being waaaaaaayyyyy too optimistic. Things can feel fine one minute and the next, you're suddenly reminded why you were really miserable before. So you can either be mature and act like it doesn't bother you, or you can be human and let it go in your own time. Being human is easier, LoL. I want to be happy, and I want to feel safe. And I'm not over it yet.

Weekend was spent very relaxingly. By visiting Zaza's itty bitty baby on Saturday. And drafting my new book on Sunday( a husband's duty). Far's will coming back on this Ramadhan (ooppss...). Tetibe ade tulis pasal Far kan. Far's told me she'll leaving on early ramadhan! and I'm gonna see her after (not sure yet) ! Maybe I should or I shouldn't.....ahhh cut the crap!!!

On Sunday, I realized that I can talk to a person, fall asleep, wake up, writing and continue the conversation like nothing happened... even though I was asleep for about 10 minutes. Who woulda think.And I'm just trying to figure out what I wanna do for the next jalan-jalan cari pasal. I really want to go somewhere in europe again, ... well, the UK.butttttt!!! ***ra wants me to go to Dublin and visit her for a bit, but there might be some I-20 issues with that and I don't know if I can risk it or not. Oh decisions decisions.... Oh!

On Monday, I went over to my uncle's house with my untie, mom, and a few cousins for kenduri and came back around 10 o'clock or something....really tired though!! until I couldn't sleep....and suddenly......I just realized, I'm not particularly good at anything specific. I'm poor in academic, poor in footballl, suck at everything else resembling sports and average in working. My writing is decent at best, so is my singing (probably), and I have no other talent whatsoever. I can't even play the piano anymore, I've forgotten so much and I'm so much out of practice. Average looks, average height...... I mean, I can honestly say that I'm a nice person, but in this world nobody really cares about that. Average person ... scary. Wish I can break free of all the mediocrity and actually be really good at SOMETHING.

And now it's Tuesday. I'm as sleepy as shit (I was chain-drinking nescafe this morning just to keep the sugar and caffeine rush up and keep me from getting sleepy while working on my duty). Work started at 8.30 am this morning. After a full day yesterday, all I want to do right now is just crawl back into bed and catch some more z's. But this morning I still managed to get myself settled a few jobs that totally required me to be awake. This morning the office is, in teff's words, really "jumpin' ". Out of all the days, it has to be the day that I'm sleepiest for alllllllllll o' this to happen. But right now I just couldn't sleep and decided to just blog a bit. Two updates in one day, I'm on a roll hehehehe. Anyway I'm excited for the last saturday game Arsenal vS. W.Brom....The Gunners had won their first match by 1-0....yay!!!

So that was how my days went..........

-fer-